My Christmas

This year I don´t feel Christmas at all therefore it´s interesting to watch people around.

You might remember my previous article about society´s expectations. Christmas is one to best examples.

I know people enjoying this time of the year, but more often I see others getting stressed. And why is that? Is it important?

Last year I had very nice Christmas. I was at the situation when I felt like I am starting my own family and I wanted a magical time for us. We had a Christmas tree in our bedroom decorated the whole December, I was making sweets and everything was just perfect.

This year I haven´t felt like preparing for Christmas at all. First of all few months ago I got scared it will remind what I had last year and I didn´t want to deal with that. And second I think it´s because I was two months off the reality when I travelled and then I got busy when I came back, that I didn´t even realize Christmas is here already.

Only one making me sentimental this year is Ignác. It´s our first Christmas together so even though I am bit ignoring them, he is getting his present of course. Last year this time he was in the shelter and the year before that he was  little puppy living in streets of Slovakia. So this year he will finally get Christmas he deserves.

Even though every year my approach is different, I know it´s OK!

What I believe is important is doing what you feel like at the moment. You want to have a fancy Christmas with decoration, sweets, presents and a lot of people around you? Go for it! Or do you feel like having a calm evening with one closest person or maybe being alone? Do it!

I was thinking to spend Christmas alone only with Ignác this year. That´s what I felt like doing. Well but at the end I invited my mum and two friends. My parents separated this year, so I didn´t want my mum (even though I wanted it for myself) to be alone and the same for those friends.

So here is already a small inner fight. I really felt like just being home, but then I thought maybe those other people don´t want to and then when the day would come I might start feeling guilty that we all should have been together.

So there is already thinking about others involved a lot.

I am not saying we shouldn´t think about others. That´s what people say around Christmas right? Think about others, be kind to each other. Yes, but shouldn´t we apply this every day and not only for Christmas? Or are we allowed to think about our own needs during the year and then we can´t during Christmas?

Well, it was my decision to invite people I love to my place this year and I am still going to do it the way which works for me. I will go for a walk with Ignác as I would do any other day, maybe have a hot wine outside, then prepare a simple dinner and gift something I created. And that´s at the end what it is supposed to be about. Having a nice time no?

Last year I wanted magical Christmas, I did everything for that by enjoying it. I enjoyed creating the decoration and baking sweets. This year I don´t have most of those things, but I am again not going to let it stress me. I think tonight I will make one quick kind of sweets and that´s it. And if I won´t feel like at the end, I won´t.

I am just occupied with other stuff in my mind at the moment and I don´t see the importance to spend evenings in the kitchen. But you know what? Maybe next year either alone or with someone I might have the house full of lights and food again. Who knows? That´s the beauty of life, you don´t know what will come next.

I am learning living at the moment and this is part of it. Do what you feel like and don´t worry about habits and traditions and people judging you. You create your life. Do what makes you happy and then guess what? Then you can make others happy too!

Merry Christmas!



I had to experience many different things, travel different places, so I could find myself. But then especially during my travels I met a lot of people, who used to tell me, that they admire my courage to go towards my dreams. And so I decided to stop keeping my story in a drawer and use it to inspire all these people to show them that they can do anything they want.

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