I will

I have been recently fighting with something inside. I have been thinking what is it that I want to share. What is it that I want to do. What is purpose of all this.

For very long time in my life I didn’t know what I really want to do. I kept following the schedule which was given to me by the society. I studied a high school, found a boyfriend, moved to Prague, studied university, broke up with boyfriend. Traveled a bit for the first time (on my own), found a job, found a flat, became adult.

Somewhere around that time I had my first break down. The whole year was very intense, new job, graduation, living on my own. I also fulfilled my dream of hiking in Norway. When I was there I felt like on the top of the world.

But then I came back. Back to Prague, back to the office. No views of the world anymore. This was a bottom. I got sick, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t go to work.

Few months later a resigned and went to India.

Everything was great again till I came back. Obviously. That time I thought I just worked too much, I needed a holiday and when I rest enough I can get back to my life.

Few more burn outs and few more travels later I realised this is just not life for me. I learnt listening my body and my soul and I suddenly knew what I want!

Now every time when I decide about something I picture myself in that situation and suddenly I can sense if something is calling me.

I learnt doing things in my life as I feel them, but there is a but. Society’s expectations don’t make it always easy for us.

Anyway. Back to knowing what I want. I always wanted to travel (who doesn’t). I want to travel and I want to write. Instead I go to work, stay at one place and only make some small trips. And all this make my flow not flowing.

For very long time I thought one day I might meet someone who will do all those things I want with me. We would travel, we would hike high mountains, we would get a house in mountains, we would travel in a van, we would just live our dreams.

But the things is that I might keep waiting for too long. Instead I am sure my dog Ignác is eager to do all this things with me so this week I decided to stop waiting and start doing.

Last year I wrote an article where I talked about “what would be the thing we would do if we could”.

Today I don’t want to say what would but we will.

And I decided I will travel Europe in a van.

I am usually scared to say things like this loud until they are really happening, like until I already bought a van. But now I think that maybe talking about it loud, leads to steps helping me to get there. Maybe till I save money to buy my own van I might get a different idea what to do with them. I am not going to prove to anyone I am going to do it. It’s just something I really wanted for many years and now I feel it’s time to make steps to make it happen.

It often happens to me that I see people traveling, living their dreams, they sold their stuff and started traveling. That’s how they have money – they say. Well I don’t have that much stuff to sell so I could live from that.

So I still have my job, I still go to work and I am saving. Probably not that exciting. But I already got rid of 9-5 job, I organise my own time and I focus more and more on working remotely so that can help me in the future with my dream life.

And this is what I share here with you.

My journey leading to my dream life. My every day struggles.

And in a meantime I am working on eBook which I would like to share with you soon. It will partly tell you about my journey and what I do to get where I want. It’s about something I call Society pressure.

Someone’s dream is to have a big house with swimming pool, family, kids, expensive car, someone wants to live in a forest. It’s all ok. But more than ok is if you get where you want and not someone else’s expectations to stop you.

Part of society pressure for me is a modern lifestyle itself.

Well I am working on it, I have my vision board and I know that even if it takes me long I will get where I want.

What about you? Where are you heading?



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